What Is EMDR Therapy? How It Helps You Heal from Trauma
Bringing the Work Into the Body: Healing Trauma Through EMDR
If you’ve experienced trauma—whether from childhood, a difficult birth, medical trauma, infertility, pregnancy loss, or a painful relationship—you may have tried traditional talk therapy and still felt stuck. Like your brain knows you’re safe now, but your body doesn’t feel it. You keep getting triggered. You shut down. You feel like you’re still there, reliving the past, even when life is moving forward.
This is where EMDR therapy can make a powerful difference.
EMDR, or Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, is a research-backed therapy approach designed specifically to help people heal from traumatic experiences. It works differently than talk therapy—by helping your brain and body reprocess unhealed trauma so you can finally feel safe, whole, and in control again.
In this post, we’ll break down what EMDR is, how it works, who it’s for, and how it can support your healing journey—especially if trauma, loss, or overwhelming stress is holding you back.
What Is EMDR Therapy? A Gentle but Powerful Approach to Trauma Healing
EMDR therapy was developed in the late 1980s by psychologist Dr. Francine Shapiro. It was originally used to treat post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), but decades of research have shown it to be effective for a wide range of issues—including anxiety, panic attacks, chronic stress, low self-esteem, birth trauma, grief, and more.
At its core, EMDR helps your brain reprocess distressing memories that are “stuck” in your nervous system. It doesn’t erase your memories—but it allows you to remember them without becoming overwhelmed by the same emotional charge.
EMDR can help you:
Feel less triggered by past events
Sleep more peacefully
Reduce anxiety and panic
Feel safer in your own body
Build emotional resilience
Reclaim a sense of control
Connect to more adaptive beliefs about yourself and your past
Unlike traditional talk therapy, EMDR doesn’t require you to talk in detail about your trauma. Instead, it gently activates the brain’s natural healing process so you can move forward without feeling stuck in, and controlled by, your past.
How Does EMDR Therapy Work?
EMDR uses a structured 8-phase process that guides you through healing in a safe, supported way. One of the most unique components is bilateral stimulation—gentle, rhythmic left-right movement (like following a therapist’s fingers or using taps or tones).
This back-and-forth motion helps the brain process stuck memories, similar to the way it would during REM sleep. It stimulates both sides of the brain and allows emotional and cognitive integration. If you’ve ever done traditional talk therapy before, EMDR might feel very different. It is structured and scripted, and research shows that it is most effective when therapists follow close adherence to the treatment protocol.
Here’s a simplified overview of the process:
History + Planning: Your therapist completes an in depth biopsychosocial assessment. You and your therapist identify target memories, current symptoms, and the life areas you want to improve.
Preparation: You learn calming techniques, grounding tools, and build safety in the therapy relationship.
Assessment: The therapist helps you identify a memory, the negative belief attached to it (“I’m not safe,” “It was my fault”), and what positive belief you want to believe instead.
Desensitization: Using bilateral stimulation, you process the memory in short sets, allowing your brain to reprocess it without overwhelm.
Installation: You strengthen a positive belief to replace the old one.
Body Scan: You check for any remaining physical tension or emotional distress related to the memory.
Closure: You return to a calm state and debrief the session.
Re-evaluation: In later sessions, you revisit the memory to ensure the healing has “stuck” and continue processing new targets as needed.
What Makes EMDR So Effective for Trauma?
Trauma isn’t just a memory—it’s an experience that gets trapped in the body and nervous system. When something overwhelming happens and you don’t have the resources or support to fully process it, your brain stores it as if it’s still happening. That’s why trauma can lead to:
Flashbacks or intrusive thoughts
Panic attacks or chronic anxiety
Emotional numbing or disconnection
Irritability, mood swings, or “shutting down”
Hypervigilance or always feeling on edge
EMDR helps “unstick” these memories and file them away in the past where they belong—so you can live in the present again.
Who Can Benefit from EMDR Therapy?
EMDR is for anyone who feels held back by unresolved pain—whether it’s from one major event or a series of smaller, chronic stressors over time. Trauma is not about the event itself, it’s about how the person perceives and processes the event(s).
EMDR can support healing from:
Childhood emotional, physical, or sexual abuse
Neglect or attachment trauma
Birth trauma or NICU stays
Pregnancy loss or stillbirth
Infertility-related grief and medical trauma
Domestic violence or high-conflict relationships
Panic attacks, phobias, and anxiety disorders
Medical trauma from surgeries, diagnoses, or procedures
Car accidents, natural disasters, or assaults
It’s especially helpful for people who:
Struggle to talk about their trauma
Have tried talk therapy but still feel stuck
Experience body-based symptoms of trauma
Feel emotionally overwhelmed, anxious, or numb
Want a structured, focused approach to healing
EMDR for Moms and Parents: Trauma-Informed Support for Caregivers
Many mothers and parents seek EMDR therapy for trauma that’s connected to their role as a parent—or trauma that becomes reactivated during the parenting journey.
EMDR can help if you:
Had a traumatic birth experience
Experienced pregnancy loss or infertility
Felt dismissed or unsupported by providers
Struggle with “mom rage” or intense reactivity
Feel triggered by your child’s behavior
Are parenting with unresolved trauma from your own childhood
Trauma doesn't disappear just because you're now a parent — it often gets louder. EMDR can help break these intergenerational cycles, allowing you to show up for your child with more presence, patience, and compassion.
Is EMDR Safe? What If I Feel Overwhelmed?
EMDR therapy is designed to be paced to your readiness. A good EMDR therapist will spend plenty of time helping you build emotional regulation tools before diving into trauma processing.
You’ll learn grounding techniques, calming strategies, and how to recognize when your nervous system is getting overloaded. You’re always in control of the process — and you can pause at any time.
If you’ve experienced complex trauma or multiple losses, your therapist will help you take things one step at a time, focusing on safety and stability first.
What EMDR Is Not
Sometimes people hear about EMDR and worry it’s “hypnosis” or some kind of mind control. It’s not.
You stay fully awake and alert throughout EMDR sessions. You are not put into a trance or manipulated in any way. You are simply allowing your brain’s natural healing system—similar to dreaming or REM sleep—to do its work in a safe, structured setting.
It’s also not a “quick fix.” While EMDR is often faster than traditional therapy in resolving trauma, it still requires emotional effort, time, and commitment.
Finding the Right EMDR Therapist
If you’re curious about EMDR, it’s important to find a therapist who is trained in EMDR therapy, and who also understands your unique context—whether that includes motherhood, reproductive trauma, childhood trauma, anxiety, or relationship issues.
Look for someone who:
Has completed EMDRIA-approved EMDR training
Offers a trauma-informed, compassionate approach
Specializes in your area of concern (e.g., perinatal trauma, anxiety, grief, childhood trauma)
Makes you feel safe, seen, and in control
If you’re not sure EMDR is right for you, your therapist can help you explore options and create a plan that matches your needs.
You Deserve to Feel Safe in Your Own Mind and Body
Healing from trauma isn’t about “getting over it.” It’s about reclaiming your sense of safety, agency, and connectio n— with yourself and the people you love.
Whether you’re carrying trauma from the past, struggling with anxiety or grief in the present, or trying to show up for your kids without losing yourself — you don’t have to do it alone.
EMDR therapy can help you move from surviving to thriving. Not by erasing your story, but by changing how it lives inside you.
Ready to explore EMDR therapy?
Our trauma-informed therapists are trained in EMDR and offer compassionate support for individuals navigating trauma, anxiety, parenthood, infertility, loss, and more. Sessions are available in person in Hermosa Beach and online throughout California.
Disclaimer
This blog is for informational and educational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Reading this content does not create a therapist-client relationship. If you are experiencing distress or mental health concerns, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional. If you are in crisis or need immediate support, please call 911 or contact a 24/7 crisis line such as the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988.
